Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Beware the Murder of Crows

It was a beautiful Tuesday morning, rare for Calgary (or it seems as there has only been 7 days in the last month that have not been filled with precipitation). After a productive morning filled with chores, coffee and some quick Internet browsing, I decided it would be a lovely day to walk to work. I should have realized that the one cloud in the sky was actually an omen that I should drive my car the 4 minutes to work -- as an advocate and strong believer of Mission Zero, it would have been the safe thing to do.

About 10 minutes from my destination is when I saw the first crow. Perched on the power line. Heckling me and taunting me to come closer. I had no idea his gang was nearby. Like Guerrillas (see what I did there) in the Mist, the crows came out of nowhere. All one could hear were the sounds of high pitched caws and I could feel their beady little eyes staring into the back of my head as I quickened my pace.

Near the Chat and Chew Cafe (the Universe is a fan of Irony), the first one decided he had fooled around enough and like the Angry Birds of iPhone fame, he swooped and dived. I screamed. My screams were lost among the war cries of the scavengers. I started walking faster...trying to keep my eyes on the birds without losing my footing. A second one swooped and then a third. I ran into the road where I thought I may be safe in the opening and someone could come to my rescue. The birds could care less if anyone else saw. I am not ashamed that I chose flight over fight.

The murder lost interest near my workplace. They returned to their original positions, awaiting their next victim.

And I have no idea how I am going to get home.