I am tired of being sad. So starting right now I am determined to be happy. I am sad because I feel I have no control over certain areas of my life...the ones I want most control in. So fine, I relinquish my desire to have that control and I am going to focus on what I do have control over. I have control over making sure I eat properly and being presentable. I have control over how I spend my evenings...which means I foresee a lot of bubble baths and catching up on reading that is not school related and watching movies I like and moving ahead with my goal to complete my degree this year. I have control over getting out of bed every morning, with a smile, happy to have another day to face.
I am putting all the things that are making me sad right now into the universe's hands for the moment. I need to take care of me and I need a clear mind to take care of me. I have to believe that some force out there bigger than me knows exactly why everything is happening this way. I am determined to make better choices when the time arrives for me to make one or two or ten (choices).
Starting right now, with this post, I am going to be happier. And smile. And remember all of the things I have accomplished even if the one thing I really really wanted to happen never came to fruit. I like myself more when I think of everything I have accomplished. I like myself more when I am not under a constant cloud of sorrow. I believe I see a little bit of sunshine peeking through.