I can’t believe it’s May! Where did the first third of this year go? I have had a lot of growth so far. Sometimes I was at a stalemate and it feels in the last month or so strides have been made. And I feel really good. I also feel really busy suddenly like I wasted the first third of the year and now I need to work over time this month to catch up.
May is filled up to the brim. I have Chuckles’s wedding which also means a stagette and two showers (so that’s 4 out of 5 Saturdays utilized!). I have a sleepover at the zoo with GirlTalk events as well as the two regular book club meetings and a Charity Chick Flick where I prepare a couple of meals that can be frozen for moms in need and bring them to the event where we will be watching The Princess Bride as a group. I am seeing Alberta Ballet’s Love Lies Bleeding which is a tribute/interpretation of Elton John’s music (they just posted another show if you want tickets and are in the area!) AND Chuck Palahniuk will be reading from his new novel which I can obtain a signed copy of. I also have a garage sale that the bike team I am on is hosting to raise money for the Ride to Conquer Cancer and I need to do some serious training for that ride. Finally, I have a course due at the end of June that I need to put some serious focus into.
I need to sit down and catch my breath. I need to sit down and create a budget for this month. I need to utilize every second I have this month to work towards making sure everything is completed to acceptable standards.
Goal for May? Do not have any meltdowns. Enjoy every minute of my busy life.
Mantra for May? I am so grateful to be in a position to have such a fulfilling life.
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
Friday, April 30, 2010
Friday, April 23, 2010
One day...
...you wake up.
You look at where you've been.
You think about where you are.
You imagine where you're going.
You realize how much time you wasted on things that weren't right for you.
This happened to me today. I woke up. Luckily, I was greeted with sunshine :)
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
You look at where you've been.
You think about where you are.
You imagine where you're going.
You realize how much time you wasted on things that weren't right for you.
This happened to me today. I woke up. Luckily, I was greeted with sunshine :)
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
Friday, April 16, 2010
Happy with my choice
I made a decision. I was on the fence for so long. I kept trying to mold myself into someone I wasn't, letting someone else have the ball in his court and decide what would happen. I was becoming a person I didn't like who was just floating, barely staying above water. I made the decision to sever a relationship I have had for many years. One that I kept hoping that I could make perfect again. One that kept getting more and more frayed every time it went through the ringer. I completely cut off contact with the ex.
I didn't talk a lot on here about what was going on in that department. How do you explain to people you never met (and my close friends who read this!)that you keep trying to keep together a relationship with someone who doesn't know what he wants and keeps telling you he doesn't want you (and then he does, and then he doesn't)? I'm not going to lie - my own embarrassment of not having control on this situation caused me to isolate myself from friends and not tell anyone how really crazy and insecure I was feeling trying to convince someone to stay with me. My isolation made it hard to tell people that I was mostly spending my evenings crying and scheming on how to make it all work out. I shake my head as I write this because I hate the person I was becoming.
So I made a decision. I decided that I loved me enough to find happiness. And that meant letting him go. And maybe I won't find what I want by leaving him, but he kept telling me I wouldn't find what I want being with him either. I took a leap. A daring, scary leap. And right away, I was pretty sure I made the wrong decision. But I decided to change the role I always play in our relationship cycle and not call him, begging him to stay.
Things are good. It's like all of these doors are opening. By not fixating on my phone and waiting for him to call or text or communicate, I have been able to focus on some other things. I feel really good about this decision. Really good. Sometimes I get a little bit sad thinking about what could have been, but then something happens and I get really excited for what's going to be.
I made a decision. And the act of finally making a decision has been so liberating. I am so excited about the future.
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
I didn't talk a lot on here about what was going on in that department. How do you explain to people you never met (and my close friends who read this!)that you keep trying to keep together a relationship with someone who doesn't know what he wants and keeps telling you he doesn't want you (and then he does, and then he doesn't)? I'm not going to lie - my own embarrassment of not having control on this situation caused me to isolate myself from friends and not tell anyone how really crazy and insecure I was feeling trying to convince someone to stay with me. My isolation made it hard to tell people that I was mostly spending my evenings crying and scheming on how to make it all work out. I shake my head as I write this because I hate the person I was becoming.
So I made a decision. I decided that I loved me enough to find happiness. And that meant letting him go. And maybe I won't find what I want by leaving him, but he kept telling me I wouldn't find what I want being with him either. I took a leap. A daring, scary leap. And right away, I was pretty sure I made the wrong decision. But I decided to change the role I always play in our relationship cycle and not call him, begging him to stay.
Things are good. It's like all of these doors are opening. By not fixating on my phone and waiting for him to call or text or communicate, I have been able to focus on some other things. I feel really good about this decision. Really good. Sometimes I get a little bit sad thinking about what could have been, but then something happens and I get really excited for what's going to be.
I made a decision. And the act of finally making a decision has been so liberating. I am so excited about the future.
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
Monday, April 12, 2010
My life in a list – things that make me happy
1.bright colours on my toe nails
2.Coffee and Baileys on a Saturday morning while reading Internet stuff
3.My furry children – Molly and Oryx
4.People’s generosity – I am participating in many volunteer events (charity chick flick, book sorting, my ride, etc.) and it is awesome to see that great people still exist.
5.Reading novels that I can’t put down
6.Soaking in Warm baths or hot tubs
7.tiny sprouts shooting up from seeds I pushed into dirt
8.shoes…especially shoes on sale
9.great conversations with friends
10.Browsing the Lego website at 2am on a Saturday night and discovering that you can download a program so you can “build” with Lego on your computer. Also, discovering they have Lego men ice cube trays.
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
2.Coffee and Baileys on a Saturday morning while reading Internet stuff
3.My furry children – Molly and Oryx
4.People’s generosity – I am participating in many volunteer events (charity chick flick, book sorting, my ride, etc.) and it is awesome to see that great people still exist.
5.Reading novels that I can’t put down
6.Soaking in Warm baths or hot tubs
7.tiny sprouts shooting up from seeds I pushed into dirt
8.shoes…especially shoes on sale
9.great conversations with friends
10.Browsing the Lego website at 2am on a Saturday night and discovering that you can download a program so you can “build” with Lego on your computer. Also, discovering they have Lego men ice cube trays.
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
One Month Ago...
...I signed up for The Ride to Conquer Cancer. In order to be able to participate in this ride I have to raise $2500. In one month, thanks to the generosity and support of almost everyone I come in contact with and network with, I have raised $1050. This blows my mind and keeps me motivated to continue finding fun ways to fundraise.
If you are in the Calgary area (or feel like flying in!), my team The Spoke Models are hosting a karaoke fundraising event at Bootleggers on April 17th. Tickets are $10 and include a complimentary drink. The bar we are hosting at is half karaoke lounge and half sports bar so there is lots to do for everyone! If you are interested, leave me a comment with your email (I moderate so it won't be revealed to the world) and let me know how many tickets you would be interested in. There is going to also be a silent auction and door prizes!
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
If you are in the Calgary area (or feel like flying in!), my team The Spoke Models are hosting a karaoke fundraising event at Bootleggers on April 17th. Tickets are $10 and include a complimentary drink. The bar we are hosting at is half karaoke lounge and half sports bar so there is lots to do for everyone! If you are interested, leave me a comment with your email (I moderate so it won't be revealed to the world) and let me know how many tickets you would be interested in. There is going to also be a silent auction and door prizes!
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
What I am Reading Wednesday
First, let's talk about Fall on your Knees. I started this novel last Tuesday. I could not put this novel down. It was painful to part with when I had to leave for work, or go to sleep so that I could work the next morning. I was pretty happy I had Friday off because Thursday I came home from work and read until I finished the novel in the wee hours of the morning.
Fall on your Knees has all the elements of a V.C. Andrews novel, but held together with motifs, themes, symbolism, and metaphor that makes each and every element of the story deeper. You begin with compassion for the villain. You kind of end with compassion for the villain. You question the family ties that bind. I recommend this novel to every one. It's disturbing, yet fascinating. And it keeps you questioning each character's motives.
This week I was in Chapters and they had "buy 2, get the 3rd free" on premier classics. I picked up three classics for my library and I am now reading James Joyce's A Portrait of The Artist as a Young Man. I have only read the first 20 pages or so where Stephen is suffering from fever and his thoughts and memories are one continuous run off sentence. The brain is interesting in how it connects each tidbit in our lives. I sometimes surprise myself with where I end up if I just lay down and let my mind wander. And then I question how I got there trying to trace back to the thought that sparked each thought. It's interesting to read this in a novel and have it peppered with fever.
I am also reading another novel titled Run by Ann Patchett, but I was having a tough time getting in to it which is why I decided to start the James Joyce novel as well. Run was recommended to me by a friend and i am sure once I get into it, it will be hard to put down.
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
Fall on your Knees has all the elements of a V.C. Andrews novel, but held together with motifs, themes, symbolism, and metaphor that makes each and every element of the story deeper. You begin with compassion for the villain. You kind of end with compassion for the villain. You question the family ties that bind. I recommend this novel to every one. It's disturbing, yet fascinating. And it keeps you questioning each character's motives.
This week I was in Chapters and they had "buy 2, get the 3rd free" on premier classics. I picked up three classics for my library and I am now reading James Joyce's A Portrait of The Artist as a Young Man. I have only read the first 20 pages or so where Stephen is suffering from fever and his thoughts and memories are one continuous run off sentence. The brain is interesting in how it connects each tidbit in our lives. I sometimes surprise myself with where I end up if I just lay down and let my mind wander. And then I question how I got there trying to trace back to the thought that sparked each thought. It's interesting to read this in a novel and have it peppered with fever.
I am also reading another novel titled Run by Ann Patchett, but I was having a tough time getting in to it which is why I decided to start the James Joyce novel as well. Run was recommended to me by a friend and i am sure once I get into it, it will be hard to put down.
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
Monday, April 5, 2010
My life in a list - why I love Spring
1. Longer days
2. Birds chirping
3. rainy days
4. bicycle riding
5. butterflies
6. beginning a new garden
7. in line skating
8. windows down while driving
9. Chocolate Easter Bunnies
10.summer is closer
Why do you love Spring?
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
2. Birds chirping
3. rainy days
4. bicycle riding
5. butterflies
6. beginning a new garden
7. in line skating
8. windows down while driving
9. Chocolate Easter Bunnies
10.summer is closer
Why do you love Spring?
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Sunday Stealing on Easter Sunday...Thank goodness for Forgiveness :)
Sunday Stealing: The 35 Questions X 2 Meme: Part Two
36. If you suddenly became single or are single, do you think you could last in a relationship for 12 months or more? Absolutely. I thrive on stability.
37. Do you forgive or forget? I try to forgive, my impeccable memory makes it hard to forget
38. Do you trust people? I am too trusting of the wrong people, but not trusting enough of the right people
39. What are you not looking forward to? Nothing particular
40. Do you get mad easily? Yes I do. :)
41. Tell us about the last time you were told you that you have pretty eyes. Every day someone tells me I have incredible eyes/amazing eyes/unique eyes....does that count?
42. Do you have strange dreams? Yes I do. Had a super strange one last night with people from my past, people from my present. There was a fight and a stabbing. I think everyone got out alive though
43. Ever licked someone's cheek or forehead? LOL. Yes.
44. Tell us about the last time you fell asleep in someones arms. It's been a long time.
45. When did you last play a game? Just the other night I decided to break out some Crash Bandicoot on my XBox (the original XBox)
46. What do you have on you at all times? usually my phone aka my lifeline
47. Do you go out in public without getting all dressed up? Yes...sometimes walking the dog does not warrant mascara
48. Do you like fruity or minty gum? fruity, but I would definitely say minty would be my second choice
49. Favourite musician or group? Madonna. Guilty Pleasure
50. Do you like anyone? Yes
51. Favourite computer game? Bejewelled or UNO
52. First album you ever went and bought with your own money? Artificial Joy Club. I still enjoy listening to that album too even though the band has disappeared
53. Think back five months ago, were you single? no
54. Do you believe in celebrating anniversaries? yes. I like celebrations
55. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? probably. But I am kind of egotistical like that
56. Last thing you bought? groceries
57. Are you a jealous person? yes
58. Does it take a lot to make you cry? no.
59. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to? yes. Shout out to DJP!
60. Have you ever had your heart-broken? Yes.
61. Have you ever done something while drunk that you still cannot believe you did? Way too many things. The best thing about black out drinking is the excuses for not remembering and the hilarious stories you hear about yourself.
62. Is there anyone you secretly wish you could be spending your time with right now? yes
63. Do you text? I would rather text than talk on the phone
64. Do you wish someone would call or text you right now? yes.
65. Is your life anything like it was a year ago? no.
66. Go back one year on your blog. Leave us a link to your favorite post. Exactly one year ago today I went and watched Alice in Wonderland performed by the Alberta Ballet. I mentioned this years program and I have actually watched Romeo and Juliet AND Moulin Rouge. I should look at tickets for the Elton John inspired one.
67. You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life, what is it? chocolate milk
68. Tell us about someone that you have lost contact with someone you wish you didn't. Nimet. I went to NYC with her last year, but over the past year we haven't stayed in touch. I think part of growing up is growing apart. I miss our ridiculous laughs
69. What is the last thing you said out loud? Shit! lol
70. Will this year be better than last? I plan on it! Off to a rocky start though in quarter one.
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
36. If you suddenly became single or are single, do you think you could last in a relationship for 12 months or more? Absolutely. I thrive on stability.
37. Do you forgive or forget? I try to forgive, my impeccable memory makes it hard to forget
38. Do you trust people? I am too trusting of the wrong people, but not trusting enough of the right people
39. What are you not looking forward to? Nothing particular
40. Do you get mad easily? Yes I do. :)
41. Tell us about the last time you were told you that you have pretty eyes. Every day someone tells me I have incredible eyes/amazing eyes/unique eyes....does that count?
42. Do you have strange dreams? Yes I do. Had a super strange one last night with people from my past, people from my present. There was a fight and a stabbing. I think everyone got out alive though
43. Ever licked someone's cheek or forehead? LOL. Yes.
44. Tell us about the last time you fell asleep in someones arms. It's been a long time.
45. When did you last play a game? Just the other night I decided to break out some Crash Bandicoot on my XBox (the original XBox)
46. What do you have on you at all times? usually my phone aka my lifeline
47. Do you go out in public without getting all dressed up? Yes...sometimes walking the dog does not warrant mascara
48. Do you like fruity or minty gum? fruity, but I would definitely say minty would be my second choice
49. Favourite musician or group? Madonna. Guilty Pleasure
50. Do you like anyone? Yes
51. Favourite computer game? Bejewelled or UNO
52. First album you ever went and bought with your own money? Artificial Joy Club. I still enjoy listening to that album too even though the band has disappeared
53. Think back five months ago, were you single? no
54. Do you believe in celebrating anniversaries? yes. I like celebrations
55. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? probably. But I am kind of egotistical like that
56. Last thing you bought? groceries
57. Are you a jealous person? yes
58. Does it take a lot to make you cry? no.
59. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to? yes. Shout out to DJP!
60. Have you ever had your heart-broken? Yes.
61. Have you ever done something while drunk that you still cannot believe you did? Way too many things. The best thing about black out drinking is the excuses for not remembering and the hilarious stories you hear about yourself.
62. Is there anyone you secretly wish you could be spending your time with right now? yes
63. Do you text? I would rather text than talk on the phone
64. Do you wish someone would call or text you right now? yes.
65. Is your life anything like it was a year ago? no.
66. Go back one year on your blog. Leave us a link to your favorite post. Exactly one year ago today I went and watched Alice in Wonderland performed by the Alberta Ballet. I mentioned this years program and I have actually watched Romeo and Juliet AND Moulin Rouge. I should look at tickets for the Elton John inspired one.
67. You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life, what is it? chocolate milk
68. Tell us about someone that you have lost contact with someone you wish you didn't. Nimet. I went to NYC with her last year, but over the past year we haven't stayed in touch. I think part of growing up is growing apart. I miss our ridiculous laughs
69. What is the last thing you said out loud? Shit! lol
70. Will this year be better than last? I plan on it! Off to a rocky start though in quarter one.
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Spoke Beads
We all remember the colourful beads you could embellish your bicycle spokes with. The tink tink sound as you sped up and down the street or went on lengthy bicycle rides around the block. I have recently purchased tons of them and for a minimum donation of $10, you can get your name written on a spoke bead and become part of my ride to conquer cancer. Just follow the link at the bottom of this post! Your name will show up as the name used on the sponsor roll on the RTCC website unless you otherwise specify. Canadian Saver, Over the Cubicle Wall and Northern Living Allowance all generously helped me out and as a token of my appreciation, please note on the pictures below, your spoke beads. Thanks again guys!
(I wanted to showcase your name in entirety on the spoke bead, hence three pics)
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
(I wanted to showcase your name in entirety on the spoke bead, hence three pics)
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Fooled again
As we are all aware, today is national prank day (or prank morning as all the fun ends at noon). I totally fell for the prank at work when it was announced our cafeteria was removing all deep fried foods, starting with fries and tater tots followed by a phasing out of deep fried meats. I felt despair. I love french fries. I actually love all things deep fried. I would be totally content deep frying everything and this is one of the reasons I enjoy carnival food so much.
So I sent an email to a few friends in corporate communications letting them know I was a sad panda regarding this news...and of course I have now been quoted in the "gotcha!" article just released. My claim to fame at work I guess.
But thankfully, fried food is here to stay (at least for now) so I consoled myself with an order of large fries.
Were you fooled today? Or did you fool anyone?
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
So I sent an email to a few friends in corporate communications letting them know I was a sad panda regarding this news...and of course I have now been quoted in the "gotcha!" article just released. My claim to fame at work I guess.
But thankfully, fried food is here to stay (at least for now) so I consoled myself with an order of large fries.
Were you fooled today? Or did you fool anyone?
I am participating in The Ride to Conquer Cancer. If you would like to sponsor me, click here
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